Oh, Sysm. That just sucks.

There is nothing in the world harder than watching your kid going through a rough time and not being able to do anything about it, aside from being a loving and supportive parent, which you clearly are.

Hugs to you both.    

Right on, man. Support is the way to go. If he realizes that he'll always be accepted and loved at home it takes the sting off it a bit.

I was that way too, but I didn't have the support at home to help me through it.

From all I know about you, you're a damn good father, the kind any son should be proud to have, and that will last a lot longer than some emotional scars at the hands of children.    

Flipper sounds a lot like my brother when he was young. It was really hard seeing the way he was treated by pretty much all kids and to top it off he was the odd one out at home as well.

Nick is right, the fact that you are dealing with this with a caring, supportive relationship will go a long way.    

La Gato Uno, I think may have some of these issues, but she’s young enough that
it hasn’t really been an issue yet. When I see signs, though, it breaks my heart. I tell myself that she will learn quicker then most what real friendship means. I have no doubt, Sir SYSM, that you will help the Flipper find that as well.    

There was a girl with cerebral palsy in my grade school that people called "Mental Susan."

I never joined in, but I didn't stick up for her, either. One day, I noticed the pretty hair ribbons her mother had put in her hair, and it reminded me how worthy of love and attention she was. I started a conversation with her, but she was so defensive she thought I was just trying to make fun of her.

Fast forward a few years to high school, and I sat next to her on the bus and had a lovely conversation. She turned out to be funny, warm, and well-adjusted after all.

She's happily married now, with a twinkle in her eye and a smile for everyone. She's also very popular with her co-workers!

It's hard to watch your child suffer needlessly, but take heart that it's not permanent.    

Also, kids who skate through life without adversity aren't done any favors. They can't handle it when it comes their way as adults.

Think of it as an innoculation of sorts; he deals with the pain now, and he'll be able to fight it better when he's older.    

How many high school quarter-backs or cheerleaders do you know who are well adjusted and happy in their life?

School is only for 10 years or so, being a miserable dick/bitch is forever.    

"Only ten years" at that age is longer than forever seems later, dontcha think?

Anyway, there's no problem at that age that a good dose of super-powers can't cure. Having discovered in third grade that neither my Sword of Thor nor my Trident of Neptune did any of the things suggested by the packaging, in fourth grade I fashioned my own Batman Utility Belt, and just waited for the super-power to come later (yes, sysm, we all know Batman has no actual super-powers, but Little Dr. S didn't know any better). And come it did: puberty struck at age ten, and for three glorious years I was a Titan amongst midgets, which does wonders for popularity if not the complexion. The Eye-Ray came later, but that's a story for another time.

Bottom line: soon all will change for Flipper, the class pecking order will be reshuffled, and fourth grade will seem like ancient history. Meanwhile, there are plenty of boy skills that aren't going to hone themselves: fishing, pine derbies, knife collecting, and (brew ha ha!) chemistry kit experimenting.

That oughta keep Flipper busy until Nature stirs the pot — which will come to pass in a bat of an eye[-ray].    

i am confident that you and the mrs. will do right by the child.

school is hard on everyone- even the "popular" ones, and most of them (us) didn't have someone so concerned.    

Thanks everybody.

I appreciate your support.

One thing that I didn't make clear -- the hard part is, he DOES have to change a bit. He doesn't understand what things he does that put people off. It would be fine if he understood, knew what the consequences were, and chose to do them anyway. But he's really bewildered. He just doesn't have the filters. And he doesn't understand other people's verbal and physical cues.

We have had him do socialization skills classes for the past year - essentially learning scripted behaviors for conversation to put other people at ease. He can do it in small bits of time, but he can't manage it throughout a whole school day. Once he gets excited, or stressed, or threatened, that all goes out the window.

The next two years, in all likelihood, are going to be awful for him. Hopefully, once he gets to middle school, he'll meet a new group of kids, and (maybe) have an opportunity for a fresh start.    

My brother is 21, he has never really learned the socialization skills but by grade 9 (my parents put him in a magnet school where he didn't know anyone) a select group of people were mature enough to see that he was a good guy, smart and funny but quite goofy.
He has managed through university and has a great group of friends.

I hope your son is able to find a group of friends that see through his ackward social skills and see the great kid you do.